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The nightmare before dinner

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You know how it goes… You’re waiting, waiting, waiting for those RSVPs to come back. Your mom, maid of honor, and wedding planner are all making phone calls and the caterer is bugging you for head count. You’re trying to get your table seating in order, but you’re not sure if Uncle Bob and Aunt Sally are even coming and that could throw off your entire reception plan.

It’s something like a bridal horror film the moment the bride realizes she chose the wrong RSVP date. It could end in tears and agony. Or forbidden Häagen-Dazs ice cream indulgence. And the guests don’t even know they’ve done anything wrong.

At my own wedding, I set the RSVP date a couple days before the caterer needed the final head count and I was lucky. All but two of my 350-ish guests had given me their response – but the two that were left were key family members that lived out of town and were difficult to get a hold of… to say the least!

Here are some quick ways to prevent an “RSVP horror” from happening in those critical weeks before your wedding:

1. Talk to your caterer.
Find out how much surplus food they cook and when they need your final head count. When you know that your caterer cooks an extra twenty-percent, for example, you don’t necessarily have to have those last five RSVPs turned in to know that you will have food for them even if they do show up. Bam! Bridezilla moment averted and your fiancé will thank you for not freaking out.

2. Set your RSVP return date to 1-2 weeks before your final head count is due.
This should give you plenty of time to collect the responses you need and make phone calls to those who haven’t answered by the date you requested.

Even if you don’t get all of your RSVPs on time it is going to be alright!

We had one guest at our wedding that wasn’t even invited. That’s right, we had a wedding crasher! But the funny thing is, we didn’t even realize it until we got back from our honeymoon, and then we were able to laugh about it. Love conquers all? Eh, who knows…

When it comes down to it, just relax. This is your day.


Just a bit of commentary: RSVPs

It’s raining today. Pretty hard in fact, so I thought I would stay inside and write a little something on my blog. Maybe I’ll just touch on a little etiquette that every guest should know (you’d be surprised!)…

BUMMER: Never assume the happy bride and groom know you’re coming to their wedding. Send back the RSVP card or at least call… preferably before the “reply by” date!

BONUS: If you are unable to make it to the wedding, you are not required to send a gift. However the bride and groom will love you forever if you do. Just saying.

When I got married, I think there were only 10 people out of the 350 or so that were invited that had to be tracked down after that ever fast-approaching “reply by” date. Even though that number was quite small, I launched a full-blown, ninja-style, bridezilla pursuit until I got a final answer as to whether or not the missing guests were going to be at my wedding.

Some aren’t as fortunate in their RSVP responsiveness. In my experience, your invitation should be an introduction to your wedding, the style and expectations of your event. Your invitation is a way that you can get people excited to come! Pique their curiosity! Make your event spectacular!

Fall Inspiration: Burnt edged linen pocket invitation sealed with hemp twine.

Fall Inspiration: Burnt edged linen pocket invitation sealed with hemp twine.

Make your invitations the first piece of an event your guests will never forget!

Any thoughts to add? I love your comments!

Happy Tuesday, everyone!

Visit my website to learn more about what I do at March 27 Designs.